Parashat Ki Teitzei (When you go out) Deuteronomy 21:10-25:19
Haftarah: Isaiah 54:1-10
I have been married for nearly 30 years and I came across a passage that really caught my attention. In this week’s Torah portion I read,
“When a man marries a new wife…” Deuteronomy 24:5
After carefully reading the verse, I learned that this section deals with when a man gets married for the first time. Hence, my wife is the “new wife” that the passage is speaking about. According to Jewish tradition, the first marriage is special. For example, at the end of the wedding seven blessings are pronounced over the couple. If one should get married a second time for any reason, such as death of his or her first spouse, only three blessings are said. There are different opinions as to whether this verse in its entirety applies to every marriage (When a man marries a new wife, he should not go out with the army and not pass upon him any matter, he is free to his house for one year to gladden his wife whom he has taken.)
In Judaism, there is a principle which states that it is a good thing to magnify the commandment. A good example of this is when Yeshua said to go the extra mile. Even though the first year of marriage is referred to in this verse; husbands, perhaps we can take few days or even a week and put every other obligation aside and strive to gladden our wives.
It is obvious that the first year of marriage represents a time of transition which can be difficult. Likewise, as the years pass, there are also other times of transition when difficulties are encountered. Deepening the martial relationship by showing attention to your wife will strengthen the marriage and provide the foundation to the relationship which will enable the couple to pass through these transitions in a manner which will cause the marital relationship to manifest the glory of G-d. This manifestation is what every Biblical covenant, including the marital covenant, is suppose to do.
I am going to begin praying today on how to gladden my new wife of 28 years and plan something that will be special to her. Husbands, why not join with me in doing the same thing for your wife.
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